Working On A Quirky Graph

Creating is difficult at the best of times. Finding motivation to create during a pandemic, job hunt and winter is like trying to get a cat to take a pill. Usually some part of me ends up hurt or frustrated. Those folks that have been using their new found pandemic time to craft new careers, bodies and art projects are amazing to me. There are days I’m just trying to stay upright.

Mom had rotator cuff surgery this week so I’ve been spending time at her house, fetching pills and blankets, water and meals. I knew there would be some downtime so I brought some of the yarn I own to work on a crochet project. I knew I wouldn’t be starting a whole blanket, but I thought I might start a hat. Something to keep my fingers busy and a portion of my brain occupied. I’m not sure why, but crocheting for me is partly relaxing for my brain. Having ADHD often means I can’t sit still or really focus on one specific thing. I’ve come to realize that if I’m working on one thing, in this crocheting a project, then the rest of my brain can calmly focus on the TV or a conversation, etc. It is fairly freeing even for a short amount of time.

I’ve been working on a scarf. It’s an easy project, lots of repetition, something I can stop and start easily. In fact, with this size skein of the particular yarn I’m working on, I can get a scarf and a hat out of the deal. Which, by the way, is slightly ironic as I don’t usually use scarves, I have more hats in my home I could ever wear and I don’t sell what I make. I suppose I could, but living in a two cat household means lots of fur just flying around all the time. I have made somewhere in the vicinity of 60 afghans in my lifetime and only sold 2 or 3. The rest I’ve just given away. Usually to my poor family during the holidays. Suckers.

This year, however, should have been the easiest year to create. I bought several skeins of yarn last year and they have sat in my living room, untouched and lonely. I retreated into my bedroom when I wasn’t at work or class. I curled up in my bed with my cats and read my little heart out. New books, old books, almost all fantasy and fiction, as I had no patience or the stomach for reality. I rarely watched the news or anything on TV. I couldn’t be bothered to drum up the enthusiasm of trying to keep track of a show. Which is where the hiccup resides in crocheting a project. I cannot read and crochet at the same time, but I can watch a show and crochet at the same time. Since I’d written off TV, so the yarn fell by the wayside.

Which brings me to the scarf I’m almost done with. At my moms house, it’s easy enough to work on something, but here both cats tried to sit on my nonexistent lap while I was crocheting. One would bat the yarn while the other would head bump my hands to get me to pay attention. Finally, giving up all pretense of being able to finish a project my mom has now requested for her friend, I pack the project away, only to have my girls lead me quickly and noisily to the bedroom and their heating pads. They didn’t settle until I was curled under my blankets with the lights off. Only then could I hear their snores.

I will have to bring the project back to my moms tomorrow, just to try and get it done.