Working On A Quirky Graph

Does that make me the turkey?

In my quest this year to walk 5 5Ks, I signed up for my sixth (don’t fight the logic, I gave up months ago) when I was having brunch with my sister and her family after the fifth one she tricked me into. Now, I had already signed up for my 5 before I went to the Summer Sizzler one where it was indeed in the summer and sizzling with heat, but she asked and I so very rarely tell her no.

Regardless we went for brunch after and her kids were super excited after and I let them know I had signed up for the Hot Chocolate that would be happening in December. I invited them along, but as they already had plans, we settled on the annual turkey trot. A tradition in several communities and run by so very many different organization for a variety of reasons, ranging from community to helping those with less, I opened a website, closed my eyes and pointed at one. A couple of hundreds dollars later, we would be suitably attired with hoodies, the niblings would have the required hats so we could not lose them in the park, and donuts would be granted us at the end of the race. I would even get yet another medal for my wall!

Ahh. The exuberance of a younger me. Who knew so many things would be in flux in the short time from then to now. Or that the organizers who ran the race would be in so far over their heads. My first mistake was not having the bib, hoodies and hats shipped, so what should have taken an hour max to get ended up being a four hour trip to navigate a mall, be told to come back, and then when I did come back a half hour later, have to wait well over an hour just to get the merch. The day of was even more of a cluster, with the actual race starting 20 minutes late while people stood, jumped, paced and ran around in 32 degree Fahrenheit (0 degree Celsius) weather with no explanation as to why. The medal line wasn’t clearly marked, no volunteers to even pretend to cheer people on, and honestly I didn’t bother with the donut line. It took me a mile into the walk to begin to feel my toes, I didn’t feel my thighs again until I got home and into a hot shower, and my tush warmed by increments on the drive home.

Part of it was my fault. I was not completely prepared for the cold. I have since purchased lined walking pants for the hot chocolate walk, which is in a week, and a wicking thermal shirt so I can at least keep my elbows warm. Honestly those were the only things to be cold on my torso at the end of the walk. Well, and my toes. And my fingers. But it was at freezing so I think I get some leeway there. I knew logically it was going to be cold. I knew logically, as I moaned in bed that morning, that I was going to end up with some freezing aspects to my body, but I didn’t fully understand where my body was in the space of energy storage, combatting said cold and my tolerance level for things I didn’t enjoy. Namely waiting around in the cold.

Lately I’ve been unable to take in a lot of food. And by a lot, I mean more than a cup at a time. My protein intake has been stupid low, and I haven’t been paying as much attention to it as I should have in this weight loss journey, but I’ve been distracted by the calorie count which has been generally under a 1000. It isn’t just that I’m not hungry, which I’m not, but that I cannot physically eat too much without becoming nauseous, even amounts that I could take in as recently as this summer, I can’t do now. It is amazing how much money I’m saving by not eating, but also ticking me off cause I’m wasting money on food I thought I would be able to eat and I cannot.

Some food also tastes weird. Increasingly, foods with some sort of sweetener, chocolates, ice creams, my syrup I use for my coffee tastes odd. Not bad, per se, but not quite right, like there is something wrong with it.

Of course, we all know that the way to lose weight is to take in less calories than what you are burning, and since I can’t take in any and am barely burning the minimum just to keep my body running, go to work and keep paying for the bills, What I’m not doing is taking in enough to jump in my car, drive across town in the freezing cold, wait around for over an hour before I walk at a brisk pace up and down small hills so that I can climb back in my car and climb back in my bed. It has taken me a few days to recover. I’m upping my protein intake in the form of shakes and bars, but truthfully I have no idea what the answer may be. The day after the walk, what should have been an easy walk and generally was, I was working out with my trainer and I couldn’t even get through a set of upper body. I felt like I was going to pass out. I cut the session short and laid down on the couch waiting for the dizziness to pass. Oddly enough, that day was the most I had eaten in more than a week’s time as well. By the end of the day I had cleared a 1000 calories with chicken and cottage cheese trying to drive my goals, but I know it will take more than just one good day of eating to really get me in a better place.

It never ceases to amaze me that I continue to have to learn the best way to take care of myself. There is never a one and done. I cannot just check it off and say this is the way and make sure to follow that plan.

Now I’m fairly certain I need a nap. All this adulting has worn me out.