Working On A Quirky Graph

While I fully believe that every day we are working on ourselves in some capacity, whether it is starting a new exercise routine, eating healthier, taking time out for ourselves on the couch or sleeping in on a rainy morning. There are several different ways of self care. Sometimes we are looking forward, by taking better care of our bodies, forgoing purchasing unhealthy foods or taking classes to improve our ability to find, get or keep a job. Sometimes we are more reactionary by working on our breathing during stressful situations, taking time to meditate in the middle of the day so you can face the rest of the day refreshed or shutting off your electronics early to get a decent night’s sleep.

Some days I see it as a fight within myself to get better and be better than the previous version. And while I don’t necessarily want to be fighting with myself, there are definite days where I am pushing to do something my original intentions are dead set against. I’m also fighting myself to be positive about any moves I make forward, and not get bogged down in a negative narrative.

Yesterday I had my best walking time in ages. While I didn’t necessarily break a distance record, I hit a mile faster than I have probably in years, and even though I was not feeling the energy to do a lot of walking, by the end of the walk I felt pretty positive about what I had accomplished. Today didn’t move as smoothly. I’ve been fighting pain in my shins when I’ve been walking for a bit now, but tonight it was just over the top. I cut my walk short and headed home early to look up shin splints to see how to overcome this battle.

While I’ve been slacking a bit with yoga because it is painful for me to keep getting up and down with the flows I’ve been choosing, I’m going to need to break up the walking routine with these yoga routines, or strength training so I can not do serious damage to my legs. Luckily I’ve picked up some knee pads and blocks to use on the mat, so hopefully it will continue to get easier as I practice the same routines. I’ve found that Apple fitness, who I’ve been using for yoga routines, have hired all the same type of yoga instructors. All of them are extremely knowledgeable about the craft, but I find their tones grating when trying to follow along. It cannot be easy to program a yoga routine to a wide audience, so I don’t blame anyone, but the jokes often fall flat, the explanations come off patronizing and the routines don’t explain to me what I’m getting out of it. I understand the flow is to help you gain strength and agility so you can move from the floor to standing fairly easy, but my weight and the strain on my knees make me frustrated with each session I try.

Honestly, that’s why I’ve been trying to up my walking, so I can do more of the cardio, lose some of the weight which I had hoped would make it easier to get up and down. When you are larger, and your knees are screaming at you, it isn’t easy to move from a table to a downward dog. Maybe if I intersperse some strength training, specifically for the legs in-between yoga and walking I can make it easier and not lose momentum. It would probably be easier if I actually stretched too, before I jumped into walking at a brisk clip around the block. Either way, I need to get these pains worked out as I want to nail down this routine before the weather changes and it gets colder. I don’t want to lose any momentum and fall backwards.

Guess it is time for me to start working a table top to downward facing dog into my daily routine so my body gets used to the activity. Just don’t ask me to do a pigeon pose. My whole body gets angry when I try that. I’m trying to win the whole war for better physical fitness. Sometimes you just have to concede one of the fights to get better.